Grace Baptist Church » Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home Woodstock, Virginia Tue, 31 Aug 2010 15:10:46 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 Churchgoers Survive Potluck Nightmare http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/churchgoers-survive-potluck-nightmare/ http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/churchgoers-survive-potluck-nightmare/#comments Thu, 02 Apr 2009 12:32:48 +0000 Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/?p=1861 ...Read the Rest]]> Unidentified Baptist Recalls Potluck Tragedy

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Tragedy struck Langley Baptist Church on Sunday afternoon when every covered dish at the church’s monthly potluck was a green bean casserole. Stunned onlookers watched in horror as family after family arrived with the same popular side dish in tow. By the time grace was said over the meal, there were over twenty-five green bean casseroles lining the buffet table with no meat dish in sight.

Marilyn Perkins, supervisor of the Langley Baptist potluck, recalls the terror of witnessing the casseroles flooding in. “I’ve heard scary stories from other churches about excess hominy or okra, but you never think it’s going to happen to your church,” she said in tears. “All I could think at the time was, Why us, Lord… why us?”

Repercussions from the church disaster were felt throughout the community as area grocers reported a shortage of Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom Soup and French’s French fried onions.

A few brave church members weathered the green bean avalanche by using large amounts of sweet tea to wash it down, while others, dazed and hungry, fled to their homes. A small faction of survivors, led by Jim Fairbanks, found shelter at a nearby McDonald’s restaurant. “Deacon Fairbanks was quick-thinking and showed amazing courage under pressure,” said Anita West. “Just when I was about to go down, he threw a Happy Meal to me. He saved my life.”

Deacon Fairbanks, however, shrugged off Mrs. West’s praise. “The real hero was Frank Woodburn, who tripped while helping other members cross the parking lot to the golden arches. I’ll never forget him lying there on the concrete, refusing my help and screaming, Save yourself! Now that’s a true hero. Frank will be missed.”

Despite the initial panic, church officials were able to restore order and send people home without further incident. Reports of one member being detained for trying to sneak extra wafers out of the church’s communion tray could not be confirmed.

In the aftermath of the ill-fated potluck, theories abounded as to why this catastrophe took place. Speculation on the cause ran the gamut from the 25 cent sale on Libby’s green beans at McGonigle’s Market to a sign of the Apocalypse. The main theological issue under debate, however, was whether it was part of God’s sovereign decree or the tragic outcome of man’s free will exercising the right to bring a lame side dish to church.

Church member Claude Anderson believes it was God’s judgment. “I’ve told them for twenty years they shouldn’t be calling it pot-luck,“ explained Anderson. “That’s an affront to an Almighty God Who doesn’t deal in luck. I just hope this egregious sin against God doesn’t ruin my chances to win the lottery. I’m feeling pretty good about my numbers this week. Cross my fingers.”

Seven year old Kenny Myers, son of members Todd and Carrie Myers, tried to put things in the proper perspective. “I’m just glad they weren’t brussels sprouts. Seriously, I woulda puked.”

Dale Morton, pastor at Langley Baptist, planned to hold a special service next Sunday to help his congregation deal with the emotional effects of the disaster. “This is a hard time for my flock,” explained Morton, “and I’m not sure the Bible has all the answers for a tragedy like this. So I think it’s important to let the people have a time to grieve and cry out to God. I mean, come on! That’s a lot of green bean casserole, even for Baptists.”

When asked if the story of the Israelites complaining about the provision of God’s manna would have any significance for his congregation at this time, Pastor Morton grimaced. “Shoot… I didn’t even think about that. Now I’m going to have to trash the analogy to Stephen’s martyrdom and rewrite my whole sermon.”

]]> http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/churchgoers-survive-potluck-nightmare/feed/ 0 2009-04-02 Aaron Freeman Update http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/2009-04-02-aaron-freeman-update/ http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/2009-04-02-aaron-freeman-update/#comments Thu, 02 Apr 2009 11:55:59 +0000 Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/?p=1852 ...Read the Rest]]> Here are the most recent updates from the Aaron Freeman Family, our missionaries to South Texas. Click on the dates to see pictures, etc from their website.

3/26/09

The week has gone by quickly and with regret we’ll be seeing my father and step-mother leaving tomorrow morning. But, we’ve managed to stay busy and get a lot accomplished. We did make it out to Nuevo Progreso in Mexico on Tuesday. It was much as we remembered it, with a LOT of small vendor shops lining the street, as well as several larger marketplaces along both sides. We managed to get some shopping done and also enjoy the sights in the area. We were definitely aware of the Mexican military presence. As soon as we crossed the bridge into Mexico the Mexican army was there with fortified positions, heavily armed troops and mounted machine guns on armored vehicles. But, overall everything seemed peaceful and quiet. Wednesday my father and I (just by ourselves) checked the border crossings at Roma and Rio Grande City. I’ve driven by them a few times, but never had the opportunity to stop and cross. We did cross at Roma into Miguel Aleman. It’s an interesting little city, but nothing like Nuevo Progreso. It doesn’t have the streetside vendors or the hustle-and-bustle. Most of the businesses were restaurants, clothing shops and jewelers. It did have the same military presence, including a small Mexican Army encampment along the river. The interesting thing about their encampment is that they are using small pop-up tents that look like they came from Wal-Mart. At the Rio Grande City crossing the border agents suggested not crossing, since the city on the other side is over 2 miles away. We spoke with him for a while and he suggested that we keep to Nuevo Progreso and avoid Miquel Aleman. In fact, he strongly suggested not crossing at Miguel Aleman. He didn’t say why. Yesterday (Thursday) we continued work on the property. My dad took charge of the kids while I was at school, making sure they stayed busy with small jobs. They did get quite a bit accomplished. When I arrived home He and I tackled the first window on the garage. It’s in place and about 1/2 way mortared. It took 80# of mortar just to accomplish what we’ve done! He leaves this morning, but I think I can manage to finish the installation and am looking forward to having them in place. It definitely made a big difference!

Just a couple of (possibly) brief updates. First, we wanted to share the good news that one of our supporting churches has increased their support level of our ministry. With this change we find ourselves now at 61.03%. This is the 4th increase in support we have since since completing our “core” deputation. When you factor in our two decreases (two churches had to lower our support due to the economy) we are still almost 2.5% higher than we were when we finished deputation, despite the rough economy. God is proving Himself faithful! Tonight we had our first “test” of the new video system at Iglesia Bautista Betania. Things seem to be working more-or-less properly with the new system, and I’m beginning to hand that off to other individuals now. I was there working this afternoon and had the opportunity to speak with Pastor Mendoza about work on our property here in Rio Grande City. He is going to attempt to organize a “work crew” that can help for a day or two this month to help complete some of the necessary repairs. We still find ourselves lacking considerably in terms of finances to purchase materials, but are pressing forward to do as much as we can to get that building ready by our June deadline. Otherwise, we all remain fine and things are “normal” here in our little corner of the world.

]]> http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/02/2009-04-02-aaron-freeman-update/feed/ 0 Candyland Church Dinner http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/01/candyland-church-dinner/ http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/01/candyland-church-dinner/#comments Wed, 01 Apr 2009 14:26:14 +0000 Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/?p=1813 ...Read the Rest]]> Saturday night Grace Baptist Church enjoyed our annual “Family Church Dinner.” The theme this year was “Candyland.” The decorations were wonderful, and they reminded me of the time when my kids played this game. (Sigh)

The Social Committee did an outstanding job with this dinner. We had a great time and let our hair down a little too.

Slideshow

Movie

preview image ]]> http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/04/01/candyland-church-dinner/feed/ 0 Sunday School http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/03/31/sunday-school/ http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/03/31/sunday-school/#comments Tue, 31 Mar 2009 16:06:03 +0000 Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/?p=1821 clipart_sundayschool_2I thank God for every teacher and worker in our Sunday School & Children’s Church. It is a great ministry with eternal benefits. This is a clever video about being a Sunday School teacher.

preview image ]]> http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/03/31/sunday-school/feed/ 1 Praise & Worship Night – Part 2 http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/03/30/praise-worship-night-part-2/ http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/2009/03/30/praise-worship-night-part-2/#comments Mon, 30 Mar 2009 17:56:45 +0000 Pastor http://gbcwoodstock.com/home/?p=1811 I realized after I looked a the last post on this subject that I left out the most amazing feat of the night.

Our very own Bob Taylor played both the electric piano and organ AND drank a cup of water at the same time!

All I can say is WOW!

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